Midlife Crisis

There is a common phenomenon called Midlife crisis. It refers to a transition period from young adult to midlife. That is time when many men and women have more or less established their family, career. Work has become a routine and losses its freshness and challenging; Children are now more independent, they start to have their own friends; spouse has become very familiar, very often, too familiar to care more. Suddenly there is an emptiness and weariness for day to day routine.

They often experience a disharmony and dismemberment that is a call for growth in consciousness and a change of life.

One of my friends, in his early 40’s, having a lucrative job and a comfortable home and a loving family, but the urge to change was so strong that he finally decided to resign from his job and became a full time minister; another one, being a stay at home for six years, she devoted her time and energy to look after her two daughters, when they entered school, she suddenly felt quite at loss;

It is truly a calling from inner live for change. It may appear as a crisis but also can be a positive self realization, as we enter into midlife, our inner unknown and dormant personality might become waken up. Maybe you were always pushed to study hard, to get good marks and get good job, you did all these because you were told so, you had to forgo some of interests you once had and let something or someone just pass by. Consciously or unconsciously you begin to evaluate your life: - childhood, you have little control, youth, you have little freedom, and now you start to evaluate your early life choices, many important choices that have made of today’s you.

What if, I did not choose to be …?
What if, I did not marry to or even marry
What if, I did not get into this school but…?

So you start to crave those things you had not done, had no chance to do or had no time to do. But are we ready to change, and dare to? Some of us are just too scare to change,


Quoting from “Passion for Life” by Anna Breennan, where she gives an wonderful illustration of midlife crisis to show that our life turning points, though sometime appears as crisis, may become a blessing to you.

“Midlife crisis is usually triggered and centered around an inner or outer event in a person’s life. ..For Rabbi Kushner and his wife, the midlife crisis was an event in their outer life that came uninvited. In his book “When bad things happen to good people”, he told of how his son’s fatal illness became the catalyst fro the evolution of his faith and relationship with God. A dramatic grown up occurred when Kushner realized that he could obey all God’s law, devote himself to doing good, it would be no guarantee that good things would come to his way. Dealing his son’s illness challenged his youthful faith and assumptions. He was forced to reevaluate and redefine his faith in life and his faith in God. He came to realize that God does not want people to sorrow, pain, evil and death, God can only help to create people despite, and in and through the sorrow, death, evil and pain that come into someone’s life. He saw that he himself was free to respond to these events in a way that would foster his collaboration with the work for the Master Potter. He came to realize that all development takes place as one responds to the life events that are molding one. He came to understand also that there is no guarantee that you will not do evil, even in the midst of striving to be a good person. But even here, the evil you do to yourself and others can eventually be the stuff of bringing about growth and development, if you contritely and humbly accept responsibility and respond to the reality around you. Life challenges every youthful idea, belief and faith itself. Midlife and mature years call for a maturation of faith on all levels.”

If you, my dear friends, are at this stage of life. It is good time to adjust, to find more passion for life, and to fulfill your life to fullness potential. Most of all, to know God and to be known by God.